Confessions of a Six Figure Professional Blogger

An Observation About Your Personal Power

November 2, 2009 | Ramblings

I got an email from a reader. I’m going to leave names out of it and I’m not even going to quote the whole thing. But, it really brought something to mind for me.

I am a big believer in the idea that the only person capable of improving or messing up your life is you. Nobody else. You get what you expect to get.

This email I got was unfortunate. I don’t want to quote the whole thing (out of respect), but I want to point out a few things in the email.

This blog stuff is way over my head, I don’t have anything to talk about that anyone would be interesting in listening to.

If you have decided that that is true, then it is.

I am disabled and house bound, and am so sick most of the time I can just barely check my email….. I am just an old wore out jack of all trades and master of none. I live on Social Security Disability, and my Wife works Two different jobs most of the time.  We are just broke Christian simple people waiting to go to Heaven.

I have to be careful here. I understand that some people are in dire straights and that life can be an uphill fight. We all understand that. But, look at this from a standpoint of personal power. This statement is full of self invalidation.

Forgive me, if I am taking advantage of you by seeing your daily tips. If you would rather I unsubscribe, you just don’t hesitate to tell me.

This is the first time I’ve ever had anybody apologize for reading my blog and being a subscriber to my mailing list.

What stands out to me here is an apparent self-degradation. He is propitiating to me for no reason. Almost every statement in the email is a statement of weakness and invalidation of himself.

If you go around saying bad things about yourself, they’ll manifest in real life. You get what you put out there.

I fully believe that the only way that you can become the punching bag of life is if you make the decision to allow yourself to be a punching bag. Things don’t just happen. They’re made to happen.

Call it the Law of Attraction if you like, but you get what you put out there. And what really tugged my heart strings about this email was that he is bending over backwards to lessen his own personal power, to be smaller, and in his own words, just waiting to go to Heaven.

You get what you create. Your life is the result of your own self-determinism. I don’t believe in luck. Go out there and make the life you want.

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  • poulshot
    You are what you think.You have to believe in yourself,for until you get to that place, how can you expect belief from anyone else?What you give is what you get.
  • Very true! It took me many years to figure out that I had to create roads. If a person want to be successful then they need to get in there and fight, fight, fight. There is something in this world that we are all good at and able to do. We may not be able to do what we once were able to, that's when we have to pick up and look in other directions for new skills and abilities.
  • "Whether you think you can or can't, you're probably right." - Henry Ford

    That quote sums it up well. It's sad and unfortunate that many people feel this way. They're only hurting themselves. I, too, am half tempted to "yell" at them and tell them to quit whining about everything. Only they can change their circumstances, but they first have to be willing to change.
  • UnklFungus
    Awesome Post David. I used to be this way to a much lesser degree. But, I am pleased to announce that I have purposely changed and I have been given an opportunity to make much more money than I have in my past, with mentorship and while it involves a big change in my life, the short term sacrifice is going to pay off in spades!!!

    To other readers, I am living testimony to what David is talking about. It really is true!!!

    An awesome book that goes along with this that shows how you are responsible for this is called The Slight Edge. I cannot remember the author right now, but it has been instrumental in the changes in my life!
  • All solid and successful people do believe in these things and that is the reason why they are successful and can overcome from any kind of problems which come to their life.
  • itcoll
    He needs to know this quote from Buddha -> "What you think you become".Unless he changes his thoughts,he is never going to come out of all the sufferings.
  • martecliff
    The phrase "Law of Attraction" may be relatively new, but the reality of it has been around forever. I know several people like the guy who wrote you, and it's all I can do not to yell at them when they start that kind of whiney self-pity. They're bringing it all on themselves.

    to Muzi - I don't think David can help him - because he doesn't want to be helped. He's happy wallowing in self-pity. I know, he claims to be unhappy, but I'll lay you odds that any suggestion you could make for improvement would be met with 7 reasons why it won't work.

    I re-tweeted this. It's an important message, and if just one person sees himself (or herself) and decides to change, then you've made a difference in the world.

    Thanks David - always enjoy your posts!
  • Waiting to go to heaven... Heaven was a concept invented by people to squeeze more work out of gullible people... The real heaven is this life on Earth, and we get whatever we want out of it
  • i always keep in mind that, if nobody gonna say you good.. you say it to yourself and keep improving.. if all people say that you are good, say to you self that you not that good and keep improving.

    another thing, don't ask what the point. i learn it from boston legal.. but pretty useful.. don't always ask for point about whatver you doing... doesn't give much good..
  • I'm glad to see you weren't afraid to call this man out. Sometimes we tip toe around feelings, but when someones being stupid then you've got to tell them and not assume that they know.
  • My challenge to you David, take it as a giving back project...assist this fellow to believe in himself. For the mere fact that he reads your blog says something. You have the power to change his mindset and use this as a case study of some sort and invest some time in showing him the light. He sent you the email for a reason, he is crying for help...please help the brother to move out of the destroying mentality that he has...
  • I can relate to this: carpenter, deckhand, Marine, engineer, now, who knows???

    But... I'm going down swinging.
  • I can relate to the person who emailed this - I used to think that my knowledge and experiences were so boring and dull that no one would want to listen to them. However, I learned at a young enough age that no matter how stupid I think an idea that I have is going to be if I leave it fly away I am only hurting myself. At least if I try the idea and it fails I have an experience from which to learn a lesson.

    I find a lot of wisdom and encouragement in songs and lyrics so if I had a chance to talk to this guy I would give him this piece of advice - "Luck ain't enough; you've got to make your own breaks."
  • D
    "..waiting to go to Heaven..."

    Well, you shouldn't. You should FIGHT until you go to Heaven. I know firsthand how people who lost almost everything feel. But I chose to stand up and do something... anything. And things started getting better...
  • Do you really believe that heaven exist. I do not think so.

    David its nice to see that you read all emails and share encouraging words and best outcome with us.
  • Brogan just recently did a post about self-pity. It's powerful, and it's an age-old killer of potential. Fact is, this guy has a LOT to share and a base from which he can help a lot of people. But to truly realize it and believe in yourself is rare, when it needn't be...unfortunately many people feel they're doing themselves and the world a service by staying small. it's just not true.
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